Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
