New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
