i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
