i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
No I am not eating basil off your cock
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
