if only i could text you this smell
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
