don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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