spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
he thought i was a dude.
handjob tips. give me some.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
