i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Welp...herpes.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
