naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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