Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
