New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
