Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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