Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
