Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Randomize
