He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I've blown a few things in my day
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
