Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
