Kiss
Puke
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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