Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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