Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
