Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
its liver damage thursday
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
