Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Randomize