that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
