How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
