I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
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