what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
