dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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