She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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