I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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