And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
