An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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