Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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