Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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