I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Randomize