He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
It's official drugs can't kill me
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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