he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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