I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
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