It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Randomize
