terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
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