You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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