So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
the raccoons are back...
Randomize