no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
