the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
