Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
