i think my mom watched the whole time
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
