hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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