i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
