dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
