he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
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