they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
