the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
